the inconsiderate you.

"Just bcuz ppl do certain things that you dont approve of, doesnt mean you have to look down on them, for you are no better then they are."

"who r u to judge the life i live? i'm not perfect and i dont live to be, but b4 you strt pointing fingers, make sure your hands are clean."-Bob Marley

after everything i've done for you, your going to say things like that. and yet you wonder why im so mean to you?
the way you treat me, no wonder i act so mean for in truth you're worse than i am.
the things you say are so hurtful, i feel so fragile bcuz they tear at my heart. you have no idea how your words effect me. do you really think of me so low? i dont see why, you by farr are no better than i. we are suppose to be flesh and blood, stronger than any bond, able to withstand the toughest obstacles.but the toughest obstacle for me is to control myself from not distroying you. i'm done with this, you have no respect for me and that's not right. just two more years and i'll be gone and you'll regret this....just think, am i really going to talk to you once i move out? honestly maya. i'm done with how you treat me and what you say, i'm stronger than you think i am. just realize that, i've been through more than you know so just watch out bcuz one day you're going to eat your words and i'll stand there watching you as you slowly but surely realize how your words have effected me...

keep looking up....

things have been going really good. for one, i told my mom that i drive around with my friends and go to lunch and surprisingly she didn't trip. i remember that during school she flipped out and started crying because i wanted to ride to the beach with my friends while jade's boyfriend was driving and he's 18 with a liscense and perfect record. haha well yeah she's crazy but i think she's slowly figuring it out that im growing up. in fact she didn't really even care that i went to andrew's house saturday. i like the new found freedom but i know im going to miss being a kid but its inevitable, everyone has to grow up sometime.

just got backkk

the beach was really funn. i had a good time and i even got a bracelet lmao. i got darker surprisingly but you can still see my swimmer's tann. all together it's been a great day so far and an awesome weekend! cant wait to see what this week has in store....

beach today!!!

lets make sure we have a blast! i'm going to miss him<3 today tho, cant wait till i get to see him tomorrow!
boogie boarding, body surfing and skim boarding! hipp hippp horray! lmao

today was..........

completely awesome. after i took a shower my grandpa came over and gave me a brand new guitar, i dont know how to play but now i have no excuse not to learn! hahaah
but that was just the beginning. i went to andrews house today (=
i thought it was going to be really weird when our moms met but it went by really fast,i was suprised.
a little after i just got there we went out to eat, that was funn. then we went back to his house and just hung out. today brought many surprises tho. first of all, i shot an air soft gunn for the first time and i snorted too. hahaah it was funny.
cant tell you much though,im keeping it a secret....

fairy tale ending

i'm someone who wants to fall in love like they did in the old days. i want someone who comes over to my house to see me and if im not there hang out with my family till i get home. i want someone who drops in out of the blue just bcuz they miss me. its just my own personal fairy tale that i keep holding on to and wishing it could come true. i'm a sucker for true love and soul mates, i just dont like the wait.

in truth

i dont really have to blogg about my feelings for him because hhe know's how i feel without me saying a single word. it's like im an open book to him.

hmm in truth...

i havn't completely blogged about all my feelings for my one special person...

edible?

hmm...the last couple of days i've been finding myself eating less. it started ever since i talked to one of the smallest girls at pe about self image. honeslty i have self image problems and a lot of insecurities. she kept saying how she wanted to lose weight and all the stuff she's done and i was pretty much like blah blah blah. her talking and the way she looked made me feel so ugly inside and out. honestly i am a better person than her but just being around her makes me feel like a huge elephant while she's the small mouse. it sucked, however, slowly but surely i'm starting to love myself. i'm more comfortable about myself than i've ever been. i still get nervous and i'm such a tease but i'm starting ot fix my faults....

my weekend was crazy.

Friday: i went home with my boyfriend and hung out at his house for a couple of hours then my friend danae took me to kims house where i was suppose to be the whole time sadly. well kims house is so much funn but i just really wanted to see andrew. we had a lot of fun and watched the comebacks. ironic part of that is when that movie came out i went to go see it with richard, hahaha. but overall friday was a great day.
Saturday: on the other hand saturday was friggin ridiculous. i went to richards grandpas surprise party which turned out no tot be much of a surprise. i talked to richard and just hung out. surprisingly we're still good friends after everything that happend and i wasn't expecting that. the big drama that night was when his aunts thought we were doing something in the room when he was just cracking my back. they came into the house all yelling at me, then richards cousin who was my age started yelling at her back defending me. i really didnt need it because that whole thing was majpor bs but whatev, i didnt do shit. my brother and jerry were in the room, we werent the only ones in there so wtf?! stupid asses. i just got madd again by just thinking about it. anywho, i was texting andrew that whole day so he made me laugh and smile when i wanted to do something really badd out of anger so yeahh. i miss him. he makes me laugh(=
Sunday: hopefully today is relaxing, i dont really want to deal with muchh.

babe text me backkkk(=